tuesday night, a dog trainer came over. she was nonjudgemental. i was worried about being judged for letting the dog on the furniture, giving him rawhide bones and whatever else someone may see inappropriate. anyway, she introduced us to the clicker method. i explained that i wasn't crazy about it... so she suggested a vocal "click" instead. um, how about "good boy" or something? she was impressed with his focus... but she had food she kept giving him, and we had minimal distractions... i already know he listens in the house or when we're alone outside. she did get to witness him being reactive when another dog barked at us outside. i explained that he was such a good listener if i saw the distraction first, but what do i do when i don't? she hesitated, then said to just walk away. great, that's what we do. with solely positive training, i'm not sure how i can ever teach him that it's NOT ok to bark at everything... i think i'll only be able to desensitize him after lots and lots of training.

wednesday, i spent all day packing. my day off was complete with miserable weather.

wednesday night, i had climbing class again! we took our first lead falls. i think i fell 10'. it wasn't as scary as i thought. it was easy to let go because my arms were tired... and the instructor was on backup. it was actually kind of fun! i really want to get my lead cert, but i have a LOT more work to do to be able to pass the test. i've been to the gym 4 times in the last 3 days. i think i'm taking today off. my arms are tired.

this morning, we met with a different trainer. i liked her. they work on a "balanced training" method. duke would get lots of positive reinforcement (through praise more than treats) and they would stop his negative behaviors with commands and action (quick tug on the lease + "no", and eventually you can drop the tug kind of stuff). i saw that during our meeting... i was kind of mad though because she was late, and they sat me down in plain view of dogs coming in for boarding/grooming. ok, seriously? i'm here to meet with the trainer, meaning i'm here because my dog has some issues. so you sit me next to the treat aisle where he can see all of the dogs come in? come on, people. i'd rather stand out in the rain than deal with that right now. that's why were HERE, to fix how reactive he is.

then we went to the vet for his flu shot. the vet tech sucked, and couldn't hold him still to take his temperature, so she just didn't do it. she couldn't hold him still for the shot either, so the vet had to stick him twice because he moved the first time. i know duke is squirmy, but no attempt was made to calm him, just attempts to restrain him. he's muscular, but at 55lb, he's nowhere near the biggest dog they have to handle. what do they do with labs, goldens, shepherds, and anything else bigger than him if they can't get him under control? i was so stressed, then we went back into the lobby to pay, and they wouldn't do my transaction at the side of the counter, where duke was out of sight of the dogs in the waiting room and calm, they made me go to the middle of the counter so duke could throw a fit.

sigh. at least we had a very good walk this morning. and, i'm sure duke is passed out from being on edge this morning.

oh, and when i got home from class last night, duke was cuddling with my roommate on the couch. male bonding at it's finest. i hate to be losing a roommate who is so good and patient with him.

speaking of which, my roommate was supposed to move WITH me temporarily, and the guy we're supposed to go live with MAY have rented out the room that my roommate was going to use. aside from the obvious reasons to be pissed (which i am pissed about), i now might have to live with a stranger and get them adjusted to duke. not cool. i'm worried of people spoiling him, leaving him too many temptations, and generally being intolerant or ignorant towards dogs in general. as i learned this summer, it's often easier to train a dog than to train a roommate... and training a dog isn't all that easy

ashley's wedding was this weekend. it was happy, beautiful, and fun. i'm glad meg was there for the 20+ hours spent in the car this weekend. seeing everyone there was great. i forget how much i miss rose kids.

i picked up duke this morning, and the trainer at the boarding place had worked on his leash skills while i was away. they used a prong collar (i'm not sure how i feel about that) and said it made a world of difference. the trainer/boarder put the collar on my arm and pulled sharply. it didn't hurt, it was just a weird and noticable sensation. he told me it is a training device and i should only use it when we're on "pack walks" (so our morning, evening and late-night potty runs will be with his regular collar). he put it on duke while inside. duke didn't mind. when he pulled, duke turned his full attention to the trainer. a few seconds later, duke turned his attention back to me, panting excitedly. this is worth a try. we'll use it for 1-3 walks a day, depending on the day, and hopefully, with time, we'll be able to pick up speed and phase it out. from what i've read so far, it's good for dogs that'll choke themselves until they can't breathe on choke-style collars (check), it's effective for a quick tug-and-release correction (check), it's not for submissive or shy dogs (check), and it's easier on the neck/throat that choke-style collars on bad pullers when used properly by the owner (check)... i guess it's time to see how he responds and go from there.

on the con side of the prong collar, aside from making my dog look more intimidating, i'm worried he'll repsond negatively to it or it'll hurt him. some sites i've read say it has no effect on training and dogs will develop a tolerance to the pain. some say that you shouldn't use negative responses while training your dog. i intend to watch carefully for signs that he's actually in pain, for signs of his behavior not improving, and most of all, i will give him lots of treats and praise when i don't need to use the collar to correct him. there is a right way to correct negative behavior without being cruel. and, of course, he'll still get his non-prong leash walks, and plenty of off-leash dog park time.

i'm nervous, but excited. the trainer runs the boarding place with his wife/girlfriend? not sure of the relationship, but she made sure to walk him to, so he wouldn't associate following commands with just the male gender. she called him an "angel" on a leash - which is the last word i'd ever expect anyone to use. we'll see how it goes and make adjustments if necessary.

today is our meeting with a potential private trainer. i'm skipping out of work a bit early so he can run around at the park before the trainer comes. i'm not sure, because the company she works for does clicker training, and seems to be one of those positive-only new-age dog-whisperer kind of places. we have another meeting on thursday, and there's still the possiblity of the trainer at his regular boarding place coming to work with us. we'll see what/who seems to be best and stick with them

this weekend was full of more highs and lows than i've experienced lately.

i was put through an emotional rollercoaster trying to improve/save/stabalize a relationship, which failed... an event that was then followed by being told i was cheated on anyway - not even told to my face. on the bright side: hello, closure. i'm ready for you.

i then made the trip down to key west with elliot to hang with ivan and participate in fantasy fest. with those two, it's impossible to be sad. basically, it was exactly the escape from reality i needed, and it couldn't have come at a better time for me.

as for life plans? well, back the drawing board.